Imagine you are with your family and close friends at a beach in Bahamas, everyone around is smiling, laughing and joking with one another. All of a sudden you hear a doorbell and come out of the dream which took your breath away. Who doesn’t want to be happier? In-fact many people feel bored or unhappy about certain areas of their life. The moot question is how do you make your life interesting or should I say positive? There is a general sense of satisfaction and wellbeing which ensures that you are happy, isn’t it?
Are you aware of that keeping yourself happy releases endorphins which are linked to longevity and good health? If not, read on as I share some old wisdom that you can follow, by engaging yourself in productive activities, and working towards your personal goals.
“The person who lives life fully, glowing with life’s energy, is the person who lives a successful life.” ~Daisaku Ikeda
Let me share Seven acts which has helped me to stay happy irrespective of what life has to offer, if I exhibit the robust mentality and maturity to deal with situations than rather than feeling myself as a victim, I see myself as a resilient victor and therefore decided to share with you hoping I could spread the secret of my happiness.
1. Love and Respect Yourself
There is a big difference between being good to yourself instead of will that makes all the difference. Your confidence is greatly influenced by the value you attach to yourself, in other words how you view yourself? The happiest people are those who respect themselves including doing something nice to cheer themselves up. Although, I’m a big believer in the power of ‘Yes’ and has learnt to say ‘No’, when it is required to say ‘No’ as per the situation. If you love yourself then saying no to something you don’t want to do is an act of kindness, and stop moving around with negativity as you were asked to do something that goes against the grain of your character. Being good to yourself is not only good for your career but for your relationship too. No wonder I’m a big believer in – “The more I give, the more I receive”.
2. Acceptance is the key
Accept yourself as a gift from God and stop comparing yourself with others. Self-acceptance means accepting your body, income, success level, failures and relations. In today’s world people are bothered if they are not making a mark by a certain age? Is it a statement of one not being successful enough? So, what should you do to overcome any inhibiting thoughts that come your way?
I recommend positive self-affirmations every day when you wake up by reminding yourself that you love who you are. Most of us stress out by trying to change thinking we will be accepted in our new avatar. It is important to reinforce that you are completely fine and in the moment. Let’s start by counting on your finger-tips wonderful things about yourself. Your uniqueness is your kindness and when you remember to who all you have been kind increases your level of happiness. Agree?
3. Have an Attitude of Gratitude
It is a well-known fact that gratitude is one of the best indicators of happiness. It is a regular habit of expressing appreciation making each day filled with joy. There is an old saying which encapsulates the essence, “If you concentrate on what you have, you’ll always have more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you’ll never have enough.”
My husband served in the Armed services and has been through near miss incidents while dealing with terrorists & insurgents in the line of duty. The way out for me was to either curse what life has given me or count my blessings for he being with me in-spite of his close encounters with death including once being mortally wounded in action. I thank the universe for having offered me this opportunity to spend time with the love of my life and what we’ve accomplished together. Once I started appreciating these things in life then I started looking at life through the lens of gratitude instead of complaining. I find myself happier and at peace because there is so much to be grateful for if we just learn to look for it. Isn’t it?
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4. Eliminate toxicity from your life
It is easier said than done but if you stop tying yourself to people, relations, friends, business partners, or colleagues who make you unhappy, your battle is half won. Although, it is difficult to have a similar approach with family members, but still there is no reason to put up with people who are unkind to you. A toxic relationship is one that adversely impacts a person’s health and well-being. There are numerous factors to consider, including communication style, conflict resolution style, dependency level, and degree of reciprocity. Nevertheless, there are established lines which must be respected because these are well defined. Look for signs such as –
- You are walking on egg shells
- You are investing more in terms of time and emotions but little in returns
- You are being held back – not allowed to explore your potential
- There is lack of independence or very little independence
- You sense a drop in your self-worth
The longer you stay in toxic zone, more damage it will cause you. It is important to catch bull by the horn and where required solicit help to move out of such sticky situations. Engage in activities that you value, which will boost your self-esteem. Sounds plausible?
5. Hope is a game changer
It is often said that hope stays till the end and it’s very much correct. Studies have revealed that hope is linked to happiness and satisfaction in life. Hoping thing will turn for better and everything will be okay reinforces positivity amidst the ocean of uncertainty in which we operate.
6. Avoid the Herd Mentality
Scheming and bully mindsets may block you mentally and bring negativity into your life. Change the course of life leaving them aside to surround yourself with people who have the desire to enjoy life by sharing happiness with others.
- Set boundaries with people who cause you grief. Say, “No” when you need to.
- Take some time to consider leaving relationships or friends that are destructive to your send of well-being or happiness.
Try and control negative thought process which affect your mental wellbeing. Having said that it is important to get rid of the causes which makes you unhappy. It may be the bully seniors at work place, scheming friends/colleagues or friends with double personalities. Cut them off from your life. Adjusting with them thinking “all is well” is not positivity. It is a sign of weakness.
Your outlook should be of perseverance through difficult times and exhibiting character even in adversity. I always remind myself that when God gives us problems then he would have hidden solutions somewhere too, which helps me navigate through situations in a progressive manner.
7. Keep Learning from Adverse Situations
You got to keep yourself motivated for growth during challenging times. Adverse situations can make you stronger by building character, educating you about life and relations, and creating a tolerance to emotional distress. During pandemic lots of people who lost jobs, while spending more at home they realised what they were missing out in life. So now they think about the prospect of finding a better job that pays more with less working hours. Shorter working hours can lead to a better and more enjoyable daily life. Many of them are fulfilling their dream of entrepreneurs by setting up their own small business eventually to be happy forever.
8. Surround yourself with positive people
Your relationships are crucial for your sense of well-being. Humans are social beings and we need to be in mutually satisfying friendships and relationships in order to be happy. If you have the option of spending time with some-one, who will you choose, people who are smiling or those with a frown on your face? If you are one of those uncomfortable with meeting new people then spend time with people whom you know and feel safe. But the fun starts once you grow in confidence and end up talking to individuals hither-to-fore unknown. You can remind yourself that strangers are friends you haven’t met yet.
9. Build your clan of true friends
Understand that relationships are about give and take, or reciprocity. Sometimes you have to make compromises. Be agreeable, flexible, and willing to shift if you need to. Share your thoughts and feelings with friends you trust. Don’t isolate yourself when you are feeling sad or frustrated. The bottom line is to have quality over quantity, just don’t go overboard, avoid compromising your values in any way or engaging in risky situations. It better safe than sorry but come what may. Surround yourself with the right activities and the right people that bring opportunities for happiness into your life. Don’t let anyone make you week by framed opinions in taking decision for yourself.
10.Look for a healthy work environment
And that makes all the difference in our lives as an employed person. You can’t afford to be unhappy at your work. After all, you may spend 40 hours a week at work.Research and survey reports claim that a toxic work environment gives birth to stress, burnout, and less productivity.
Get into a profession that pays your worth, provides growth and supportive team work, promotes equality and fairness. One must feel valued at the end of the day.
11. Improve your lifestyle Score
How would you that? By adopting good habits like going vegan, eating healthy, doing physical exercises yoga or aerobics. Practice yoga, Pranayama/breathing exercises, picking up a sport, community engagements like Contributing in social clubs, happiness clubs and do charity.
12. Not expecting too much from Life
Let it flow like a rives making its own tributaries and distributaries. Do not try to change the course of flow by being too ambitious. Keep enjoying the brimming cup of life between the sips and till end.
Hope it resonates with you all. Wishing that you gain in confidence with each passing day to keep the happiness quotient high. May your soul bloom into a smiling flower spreading the spirit of love. Take care and have a happy day.
Author Bio: Rashmi Kashyap is a Postgraduate in English, IELTS qualified content writer, an academician with experience of two decades, a certified career counselor, has also done her two years diploma in Fashion designing from the Delhi institute. As a passionate blogger and a storyteller, she weaves her travel and Army life experiences into poems and articles which can be read on her website, soulnpiritblog.com her own little corner on the internet called SOUL N SPIRIT. You can follow her on her social media handles to get a glimpse of her latest content.
